I hate philosophy
wow... now it's been a really long time since i've been here... actually i just remembered it. it's four thirty in the morning. i'm not sure how clear my thinking is at four thirty in the morning, but i guess we'll find out now.
the events over the past couple of days have really challenged my thinking. in a bizarre kind of way, they've been good for me. i'm not gonna elaborate here - it's my journal and i know what im talking about, and i know that the people that count know it too. if they don't , that's because it's none of thier business.
with that said, this has been really good for me. i know i felt really betrayed at the beginning, but i actually talked to the one who will remain in this entry as the Miscommunicator. Miscommunicator told me what seemed like the honest truth- hard to tell, since we were online. not my preference, but at least we worked it out. supposedly (and what did i expect) she did nothing wrong, but i couldn't have known that since the facts relayed to me weren't credible either.
all of it really makes no sense now, looking back on it. there's a major loophole where bestfriend #1 may have been lying, and if not, the Miscommunicator's apology was a lie.
I hate philosophy.
It seems that when i write, it no longer sounds like me. This entry doesn't sound like me, it sounds like a late 1960's author. why does that always happen?
maybe i'm a forty year old at heart.
maybe i'm senile already- that could explain a lot.
I don't know... that argument is in the past, but i'm still left to wonder. i mean, i've let her off, or rather... this kind of thing happens between us all the time. It appears to be that she's deliberately trying to mess things up for me, then somehow i understood it all wrong.
^^That's probably not the way it is. I probably do understand and am too soft to realize that she's lying to my face to get it out.
But the thing is, i really can't be sure. i'm the kind of person who believes everything i'm told until the person proves they can't be trusted. i know some people like that - but the numbers are quite small...
In further news... squaredancing... what mixed feelings i have.
Ad-selling... no new news there... i sill have no clue where to start ... and i need ideas.
I think i can sum up my experiences with the Miscommunicator very easily - be very careful who you tell things in confidence to, and when you know a darn secret, keep it! and dont' add to it. or change it.
stuff got all messed up and twisted. by the end of it, someone said i had been flirting with shane. and we know that's not right. i mean, as far as the two of us are concerned, he's my squaredancing partner and that's it.
I think i've said enough for one entry. i have to go get ready for school.
the events over the past couple of days have really challenged my thinking. in a bizarre kind of way, they've been good for me. i'm not gonna elaborate here - it's my journal and i know what im talking about, and i know that the people that count know it too. if they don't , that's because it's none of thier business.
with that said, this has been really good for me. i know i felt really betrayed at the beginning, but i actually talked to the one who will remain in this entry as the Miscommunicator. Miscommunicator told me what seemed like the honest truth- hard to tell, since we were online. not my preference, but at least we worked it out. supposedly (and what did i expect) she did nothing wrong, but i couldn't have known that since the facts relayed to me weren't credible either.
all of it really makes no sense now, looking back on it. there's a major loophole where bestfriend #1 may have been lying, and if not, the Miscommunicator's apology was a lie.
I hate philosophy.
It seems that when i write, it no longer sounds like me. This entry doesn't sound like me, it sounds like a late 1960's author. why does that always happen?
maybe i'm a forty year old at heart.
maybe i'm senile already- that could explain a lot.
I don't know... that argument is in the past, but i'm still left to wonder. i mean, i've let her off, or rather... this kind of thing happens between us all the time. It appears to be that she's deliberately trying to mess things up for me, then somehow i understood it all wrong.
^^That's probably not the way it is. I probably do understand and am too soft to realize that she's lying to my face to get it out.
But the thing is, i really can't be sure. i'm the kind of person who believes everything i'm told until the person proves they can't be trusted. i know some people like that - but the numbers are quite small...
In further news... squaredancing... what mixed feelings i have.
Ad-selling... no new news there... i sill have no clue where to start ... and i need ideas.
I think i can sum up my experiences with the Miscommunicator very easily - be very careful who you tell things in confidence to, and when you know a darn secret, keep it! and dont' add to it. or change it.
stuff got all messed up and twisted. by the end of it, someone said i had been flirting with shane. and we know that's not right. i mean, as far as the two of us are concerned, he's my squaredancing partner and that's it.
I think i've said enough for one entry. i have to go get ready for school.